2-Day Private Marriage Intensives

Perhaps your relationship needs fast and immediate attention. Or, you may simply be wanting to “jump-start” your relationship to the next level. For those who can’t, or prefer not to do the “Getting the Love You Want” group workshop, the Marriage Intensive is another way of getting a concentrated experience of this work, geared to your particular needs. Taking the time to do the work in this “intensive” format is often much more powerful than spreading the work out over weekly, 60 or 90 minute sessions. It is especially helpful for those who are feeling “stuck” in old patterns of interaction (which is most of us!) We typically meet for 2 full days—9 a.m. to 5 p.m., with a break for lunch.  This can be done online (via Zoom), or in-person, in Carlsbad/San Diego.

What you can expect from the Marriage Intensive:

• My experience is that most couples have just a few core issues, but these come up over and over again.  By the time you come to see me, it may feel impossible to break these patterns.  My job is to help you to understand what is underneath these patterns, and to help you break free of them.  We do this in several ways:

1. Exploring common themes that come up in all relationships, including: the Stages of Relationship, Attachment Patterns, Neuroscience of Relationships, and much more.
2. A deep understanding of the specific patterns that you and your partner have that may be causing conflict and distress (including affairs and other breaches of trust), and how to transform these into opportunities for healing and growth.
3. Exploration of childhood and family histories, and how these may be affecting your adult interactions. 

• In addition to understanding “what” causes some of these difficulties, you need to have skills to change how you communicate with each other, especially in times of conflict.  The primary skill that we teach is the “Imago Dialogue” process.  Our time together will allow us to practice this method over and over, and help you to begin to gain a sense of confidence in using it.  This in itself will go a long way in relieving feelings of hopelessness or helplessness when difficulties arise.  Knowing that you have a safe method for communication is crucial to creating a more general sense of safety and trust, which is necessary to feel emotionally close and connected.

• “Mindfulness” is a popular term these days.  And in fact, it lies at the core of all we do. We will work on developing greater awareness and intentionality in your day to day interactions, and creating more love, joy, and harmony.   Wouldn’t you prefer this over conflict, criticism, and blame?  Working together as a couple to find your positive intentions is extremely valuable.
  
• We will work together to help you to restore the passion, joy, and intimacy that brought you together at the start.  For some couples, the need to prioritize your relationship, and set aside time to be together is the first step.  Perhaps you have stopped doing things that brought you joy (including sexual intimacy), and need help reconnecting in that way.  
• At any stage of relationship, it is important to have a shared vision of your future to be working on together.  We will begin to lay the groundwork for a “Relationship Vision” to help guide you moving forward to the relationship of your dreams!

Please contact Ben for further information about pricing and availability.